Sometimes when it's been a particularly hard week and I'm laying in bed, I imagine myself picking up the chair by the window and throwing it. Like in the movies - it crashes through the window and hits the ground below. Would I feel better? Then I wonder if I could really pick it up and if it would actually go through the glass. It would most likely just crack the glass and get stuck on the wood framing between the windows...and then I would have to explain why the chair was caught in the window. Is that worse than explaining why it is on the ground below? There were days in those first two years that I really felt like I might try it at any given moment - times that I felt so desperat
When Meghan first started with her symptoms, and no one seemed able to help us, I turned to the internet to find answers. There is so much stuff out there. Some good, some bad, and some just down right weird! You have to be able to weed through the hundreds and hundreds of articles and blogs and find things that seem credible or helpful or even relatable. I was afraid it would seem cliche to start another one - not to mention the numerous times I had said to others that I disliked blogs - but really a lot of my best bits of information came from others talking about their symptoms and things they had learned about their experiences. I would take notes or print out portions of blogs and
A few years ago, I remember watching a story on 20/20 or 60 Minutes about several high school kids from a small town in New York exhibiting strange, uncontrollable, and unexplained behavior. The community had many thoughts on the cause - such as something in the water or the kids were all pretending as a group. But some thought it was PANDAS - pediatric autoimmune neuropsychotic disorder associated with streptococcal bacteria. That was the first time I had heard of it. PANDAS is a neurological condition where antibodies are thought to cross the blood brain barrier and affect the basal ganglia portion of the brain. It is a medical illness and not a psychiatric condition. The basal gangli
